Anxiety + Depression = My Life

Hello! I hope who ever reads this is having a good day/night.
I’m a twelve year old girl and I’ve been going through a lot of Anxiety and Depression through out my whole life. I was four when I first attempted suicide. I’ve been lied to by one of my closest friend and they still are lying to me to this day. My Mom doesn’t care about me because when I told her I was cutting she said “If you cut yourself again I’ll send you to a Audi Home!” Then we just kept going on with our day.
When I attempted again and someone told on me. This is when I went to a therapist and my Mom just lied her way through it. “Oh I want her to get the help she needs! I love her so much!” Yet she also told me “You make me want to kill myself.” My therapist doesn’t believe me and she hasn’t contacted me in months. I don’t think she likes me very much.
In my past my Mom has abused me by hitting me. One time she beat me with her black heels and gave me a black eye. All because I lost a sock the night before.
My siblings won’t talk to me. My only close friend just lies and I have to write to her because I’m scared to talk to her in person. She usually helps me with my Anxiety attacks. When people were making fun of me saying “Your hair looks like ‘Insert insult here’!” She just laughed with them and when I asked her to stop she just says “Shut up. Do you want me to make fun of you and tell everyone about your cutting and suicide?”
I have nobody to talk to so I’m posting this here. I hope I can just end this all soon. Thanks for reading and I wish you the best of luck!

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